Eating with Friends when You're Gluten-free

How do you, as a gluten-free person, feel when a friend invites you over for a meal? Nervous? Afraid? I’m sure that’s how the friend feels, too!

I’ll admit it. This is the area I find most difficult as a gluten-intolerant person. I like visiting with friends! I want my friends to be comfortable, but I must stay healthy. Eating in restaurants is sometimes easier.

Find What Works for You

Let me tell you how I handle this. You decide what works best for you. Each individual has a different level of intolerance for gluten. I hope that I can help you find a solution that makes you comfortable.

The Invite

What if a new friend or neighbor who invites us doesn’t know that I’m gluten-free? I once made the mistake of assuming my old friend whom I hadn't seen in a long time knew that I was gluten-free. She served lasagne! I felt so bad when I had to tell her that I couldn't eat it. She felt terrible, of course, and graciously fried up some eggs for me. I won't let that happen again!

Now, I try to tell my potential host immediately but in a lighthearted way. I say something like I know I’m a pain to cook for and please don’t try to make anything special for me. I offer to bring something to contribute to the meal that I can eat and I choose something that if that’s all I eat, I will be okay. However, it’s also something I will share with everyone else, like this Chicken Mango Avocado Salad.

Eating in Someone Else's Home

I’ve never had anyone take me up on the “don’t make anything special for me” part yet, though! In that case, I try to politely double-check anything questionable. Is there soy sauce? Are the oats gluten-free? I really like it when they’ve saved packaging and I can read the labels.

Potlucks

We go to lots of church potluck dinners. There, I usually eat only what I have brought myself. If I have the opportunity, I choose to place my contributions on the table away from bread or anything crumbly-looking that might drop glutenous crumbs on my food. Then, I try to be near the beginning of the line to get my food, not that I’m a me-first person, but to get my food when there’s less chance of other crumbs dropping on mine. I consider it a bonus if someone who knows how to do gluten-free well tells me what they’ve brought and that it’s safe for me to eat.

Hosting Gluten-Free Guests

If you are hosting a gluten-free guest, let me give you some tips to help us feel at ease.

Quick Tips

Gluten-free food must be prepared in a clean area with clean equipment.
Any oats need to indicate “gluten-free oats” on the packaging ingredients.
Soy sauce must be labelled gluten-free.
We can’t use butter, jam, mayonnaise, or peanut butter that may have had a gluten-contaminated knife dipped into it.
Yes, a little bit of gluten will hurt us.

Learn More

Reading How to Eat Gluten-Free at Home might give you a better understanding of the kinds of things we need to think about.

Making Guests Comfortable

Then, when you’ve taken these precautions, tell us! Your gluten-free guest will be put most at ease when you outline in detail what you’ve done. I don’t mean to do this in a way that indicates what an inconvenience we’ve been, but in a way that assures us that you understand and have taken the steps that are necessary to keep us safe.

We do genuinely appreciate the willingness of a host to accommodate our needs by making the extra effort to prepare us safe food.